Hero

Kalamack 24

level 63

I'm NOT a cookie maker! ☾

Age 12 years 8 months
Personality neutral
Guild no guild
Monsters Killed about 122 thousand
Death Count 53
Wins / Losses 27 / 43
Temple Completed at 09/18/2013
Wood for Ark 40.2%
Savings 1M, 851k (6.2%)

Equipment

Weapon grater of two evils +74
Shield magic mirror +75
Head shroud of clarity +75
Body shroud of mystery +72
Arms suicide watch +71
Legs lederhosen of redemption +72
Talisman unlike button +75

Skills

  • palm of the Panda level 41
  • heel grip level 38
  • street magic level 36
  • swoop of the smith level 35
  • scissorhands level 31
  • golden vein level 29
  • bloody itch level 29
  • concrete placer level 28
  • glance of Kaa level 26
  • Cheshire smile level 21

Pantheons

Templehood8279

Achievements

  • Honored Favorite
  • Builder, 1st rank
  • Careerist, 1st rank
  • Renegade, 1st rank
  • Animalist, 2nd rank
  • Martyr, 2nd rank
  • Saint, 2nd rank
  • Shipwright, 2nd rank
  • Champion, 3rd rank
  • Coach, 3rd rank
  • Hunter, 3rd rank

Hero's Chronicles

I can be such a renegade. Really, watch me!

Yelled ’I’m NOT a cookie maker! ☾’ at the Fire Hydra and it died laughing.

Saw a really cool item at a great price, but LisaAlexandra wanted it too, so I let her buy it instead.

Wind Rider jumped in front of me and yelled, “Interception!” as the healing ray descended from the heavens. Please try it again, Almighty, she’s gone now!

Just encountered a Gummy Wyrm selling bootleg ’I’m NOT a cookie maker! ☾’ T-shirts. It shall pay dearly for this trademark violation!

After such a glorious battle with the Satan Claus I could not bring myself to deliver the finishing blow. Instead, he will be my new companion. Come along, Pumba, let’s go questing!

Lightning bolts streaked across the sky and burned “Kalamack was here!” into the hillside. Impressive. Not very useful, but impressive.

They say history is written by the victorious. That’s not true. For the record, I, Kalamack, died this day at the hands of a Thirteenth Apostate.

Now I’ll be featured in the Godville Times! Too bad I’m in the obituary section.

Crap! The lifetime guarantee on my armor just expired!