The Terrific Tale of Tarabella the Third
Tarabella is the third daughter of a peasant farmer and his duchess wife who prayed to the gods and goddesses for a miracle as his family was ridiculed by the town for the love but mismatched status marriage. The benevolent goddess Tiranna heard the heartfelt prayers and decided their efforts should not be in vein. She blessed the family by declaring she would take their youngest child Tarabella under her wing once she turned 16 to return glory to her family as well as honor the goddess herself.
Tarabella grew up to be a gender stereotype fighting, empowered young girl who aspired, like all other little girls in the village, to be like a Disney princess- not. Her one true hero was Mulan and she searched for dragons in her spare time as days drag on. She would practice her martial arts as well as actual arts for a truly cultured upbringing to fufill her dream of supplanting the patriartchy in the land one day. She also spent a great deal of time judging the law of the land and ate as much chocolate chip mint ice cream as she could. This girl mint business when it came to sweets and anyone in her way would get their just desserts. In fact, Tarabella also had the firm goal-she did not waffle cone from the idea- of opening a cool, hip restaurant called Superfragilisticexpodious specializing in ice cream that would explode in your mouth.
However, the instant Tarabella turned the fateful age of 16, her dreams was replaced by a higher calling quite literally. She was swiftly whiskhered off on a flying ice cream eating tabby cat over the rainbow to embark on her new quest to snake her name into the books as one of the greatest, most writetous heroines of her time. Like they say, the rest is hisstory or herstory…
Her goddess is currently requesting her to take on more quests to better herself so plans to smash the patri-art-chy and open up the ice cream restaurant has been postponed and this PSA is posted till further notice.
Tarabella has acquired a talking donkey named Fido as a pet. Quite a fitting pet since she’s a kickass heroine even if she is probably the only one who thinks so and thinks everyone not agreeing with that is horsing around with her…
Unfortunately the talking donkey has since passed on and Tarabella’s new sidekick is a stripless zebra by the name Snowy. Brah, the ze-bra is more support than people would think and helps keep Tarabella on her toes when she’s a little too deep in her cups of vodka. Snow way Tarabella can be defeated with Snowy by her side!
Snowy ended up leaving for greener pastures and Tarabella was inconsolable. She bearly made it through her grief until a bipolar bear named Bolt bolted into her life. Bolt and Tarabella may be polar opposites but they make a great team together rather than bi themselves!
After countless tempestuous events, Tarabella finally erected a temple in Tiranna’s honor on the temperant 15th of February. It would have been the 14th but she was too busy drinking her woes about being unbeerably single on Valentine’s Day away. Apparently, many heroes cannot handle her strong, independent self! Hate to brick it to them but Tarabella is tarafic so it is their loss. Whis-key opens the lock to her heart for any interested heroes out there!
Bolt ended up bolting off in the end, staying true to his namesake. Tarabella was in unbearable grief until a solar bear by the name of Sandy dropped in to light up her life. Tarabella is looking on the sunny side of things now. Hopefully Sandy won’t become too ingrained into Tarabella’s life in the meantime if it decides to scamper off to power up solar panels in the future.
Tarabella is currently logging in overtime hours to build up the ark. It doesn’t float her boat to spend that much time on it but it will float her goddess Tiranna’s! She personally would much rather canoe-ddle with a hero or hunker down beers and it causes her sor-row to waste a yacht of her time knot doing what she wishes to do.
Alas, Sandy did not under sand just how deep Tarabella’s sorrow would be when it waved goodbye at 32. All that time together simply swept away… Unfortunately, life can be a beach sometimes. Tarabella was undersandably feeling rather pail for weeks until she managed to shovel her sorrows and linked up with Fang, hyper lynx, on her adventures. They seem to be getting along splendidly although even a byte of sugar can lead to extreme hyperness!