Temple completed at 00:50 07/29/2012:
00:50: Suddenly my bag of money burst open, spilling its contents on the ground and forming a solid golden brick. Shiny!
02:03: Dearest diary, today was the day! I carefully laid the last brick, swept all the rooms, opened all windows to let your glorious light shine in. I can’t believe it, your temple is finally finished, my Lord! I feel delirious with happiness.
Pet medal at 02:18 on 07/17/2013:
02:18: Behemoth was suddenly surrounded by a sparkling glow and began skipping around and humming happily. Hey, I think he just leveled up!
Ark at 15:35 on 08/13/2017:
15:35 A log! A thousandth log! I’m even ready for a flood now. Not that I’m asking for it, Mighty One.
Ark 2 at 03:23 on 07/28/2019:
03:23 I have succeeded in believing in you Great One. It seems no one else wants to worship you.
Finally! My quest to succeed where all others have failed is done. After hearing about how epic I was, I humbly accepted a pile of wooden ark planks and a gift-wrapped, triple-sized chunk of experience.
Featured in Newspaper on 12/14/2019:
Compo — 105th-level adventurer, member of the “Ankh-Morpork City Watch” guild, with the motto “RIP Jean Fergusson”, stands at the 3rd position in the pantheon of creation under the vigilant supervision of the god Zerbey. His worst enemy — a Bitter Chocoholic. Favorite trophy — something that looks like a bucket of striped paint. He is also a huge fan of Simpletown’s pubs.
All pairs collected at 15:38 on 02/19/2020:
03:38: Monsters come and monsters go, but you cute fenimal, into the ark you go.
03:38: Luminous One, I just re-counted the pairs and I think the ark now has a thousand of them. We’re not going to cram another thousand in there, are we?
Boss awakened at 07:51 on 05/25/2020:
07:51 It’s alive… It’s alive, it’s moving, it’s alive, it’s alive, it’s alive, it’s alive, IT’S ALIVE!
Honoured Animalist at 22:12 on 05/30/2020:
22:12 With a crash, a bang and a wallop, Sparky suddenly reached the next level. He’s not going to overtake me, is he?
Ark 3 at 08:35 on 07/04/2021:
08:35 Notes from the arena: Porsh Porsh is on her knees. Compo salutes to the heavens! The winner got richer by 6682 coins and a golden brick. The winner gets a log of gopher wood in accordance with the special rule of this fight. The loser cadged 133 gold coins back.
Elected Guild Leader of Ankh-Morpork City Watch 04/19/2022.
Book at 04:17 on 04/21/2023
04:17 Wrote down the thousandth word into the holy book, took a deep breath and snapped my numb fingers. Hallelujah, Great One, the great work is done!
Shop at 15:50 on 05/16/2023
15:50 Oh my god, can’t believe that I saved all this money! Finally I can have my very own shop!
Ark 4 at 01:21 on 07/19/2023
01:21 Turns out epic is too epic to be defined epically enough. After managing to define the meaning of “epic” so quickly, I got a pile of wooden ark planks and 6660 gold coins as a bonus.
Attempting to figure out how long it’ll take me to get other achievements…
Souls:
04/21/2023 – 0%
09/03/2023 – 10%
12/25/2023 – 20%
05/01/2023 – 30%
07/22/2023 – 40%
I’m not watching Ark speeds or actively trying to get logs (maybe I should!) but it seems every 2 years or so. I finally have this Shop finished, so I’ll start working on getting the Dungeon and Sail achievements since there doesn’t seem to be any way to speed up Souls other than being patient.